I think your only chance is to get a relative to write a large (7 figure) check to one of those universities, fast. Because the only way you are going to spend any time at any of those schools is if you get a job in the dining room. Not meaning to be negative, because you are obviously a good and caring person. But you have to have realistic expectations, or you will make yourself very unhappy at a later date. I wish you the best.
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